For Rom El-Hai, music had always been a place to escape the noise of the world and be present in the moment.
On Oct. 7, 2023, that sense of safety disappeared.
Now, he travels across the U.S., sharing his firsthand account of the Nova Music Festival attack and working to make sure the day is remembered.
El-Hai, 29 at the time, arrived at the festival in Israel around 2 a.m. He had initially planned to skip Nova but agreed to volunteer three days before the festival in exchange for a ticket.
About 6:30 a.m., while dancing with friends, El-Hai looked up and saw missiles exploding in the sky.
His first thought, he said, was that the party would be shut down.
About 10 minutes later, a police officer came to the DJ stage and told attendees to gather their belongings and leave.
What followed was an attempt to escape the festival as gunfire erupted around them. El-Hai and his friends initially returned to their car, but traffic quickly became gridlocked. They eventually abandoned the car and ran into an open field.
Just before 9 a.m., El-Hai received a call from his mother. He hesitated before answering.
“When you're in the middle of a terror attack, the last thing you want to do is to speak with your mom,” he said.
Eventually, he decided to answer. As bullets flew overhead, he told his family he was safe. He wanted them to believe he was OK.
For hours, they moved between fields, bushes and other hiding places as they tried to find a safe route out. El-Hai said they eventually joined a larger group of survivors and faced a choice between two directions: a water station or greenhouses.
They chose the greenhouses.
After hours of hiding with no water or food, and with gunfire still ringing loudly, they had to make a decision — one that would spell the difference between life and death.
When he was eventually reunited with his family, El-Hai said the moment was deeply difficult.
“I saw my mother. I gave her a big hug, and it was not a nice, emotional hug or meeting. It was a painful meeting,” he told the crowd gathered in the Albert A. Capellini Community and Cultural Center Thursday night. “I feel shame. I feel guilt. I feel humiliated... all I'm thinking about is the other people that still don't [get to hug] their mothers.”
In the months that followed, El-Hai found support among other Nova survivors and began traveling to share his experience. Before Oct. 7, he said, he was “a regular guy” who sold insurance and attended music festivals on weekends.
Now, he describes sharing his story as a responsibility.
“I have to tell it,” he said, adding that his role is to be “a voice for those who can’t speak and a voice for those who will never speak again.”
El-Hai was brought to the community remembrance event by local students, including those from Yorktown High School and John Jay High School, who are members of Lights of Tomorrow, the organization that helped organize the gathering.
The event drew elected officials, including Supervisor Ed Lachterman, Councilman Ilan Gilbert, state Sen. Pete Harckham, Westchester County Executive Ken Jenkins, Westchester County Board of Legislators Chairman Vedat Gashi, Assemblyman Matt Slater and others. Speakers discussed the significance of having a survivor share his experience with the community, the importance of remembering those who were killed, and concerns about antisemitism and hate.
The Yorktown Town Board issued a proclamation at its meeting Tuesday. It was read at the remembrance event and presented to the organizers.
Near the end of his presentation, El-Hai displayed photos of friends who were killed on Oct. 7.
“Their only sin was just to be Jewish. Just like you,” he said. “It could easily be each one of us. We can't forget that and we can't forgive that.”
El-Hai said the experience also showed him the “power of unity” and the importance of people caring for one another.
He ended his presentation where his story began: with music, which he said can unite people across borders, languages and cultures.
“I know that we will not let hatred win,” he said. “We will never stop dancing.”
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