A Christmas wish, and memories worth holding onto

James Martorano

I want to wish all my readers the most joyous holiday and a healthy, happy New Year.

I'm planning to continue exploring interesting and important topics with you, hopefully in a cogent and compelling way.

2025 has been a tough year for all of us, so it’s particularly welcoming to put our troubles aside and celebrate the holidays with family and friends. Being the sentimental fool that I am, it wouldn’t be the same if I didn’t ask you: What are your fondest holiday memories? As is my practice, I will go first:

I can go far back. I grew up in the 1950s, and I can tell you without hesitation that those were much simpler times. My parents raised my sister and me as Roman Catholics in the small city of Ansonia, Conn. The population of the United States was about half of what it is today. There was no “Black Friday,” the internet or cable television. Political service was considered an honorable profession. Insane and dangerous conspiracy theories were relegated to the very few “crazies” and never actively promoted or espoused by any elected officials. Of course, with 2025 hindsight, I do wish that people in responsible positions in the 50s and 60s had gone further and publicly and vehemently rejected the extremists. Today, sadly, it’s a totally different story. But I digress.

In the 1950s, we had concerns. We were, for example, concerned that nuclear war between the United States and Russia could happen at any time. In school, we practiced drills that had us hiding under our desks. My home (a large nursery school) was designated as an official fallout shelter. Despite these concerns, we all enjoyed the Christmas season without reservation.

You couldn’t avoid noticing that it was Christmas time. People’s homes were adorned with elaborate light displays, often enhanced by a giant Santa or reindeer on the front lawn. My family usually took Sunday drives to enjoy the displays the citizenry proudly put on. The cities and towns themselves competed to see which one could exhibit the most extravagant decorations. In the 1950s and 60s, banks promoted “Christmas Clubs,” which asked its members to contribute five or 10 dollars a week (yes, people got paid every week, there was no direct deposit) into a special savings account that would then be cashed in around the first of December, creating a source of delightful holiday spending.

The Christmas season did not begin until December. Today, the line of demarcation gets earlier and earlier. As mentioned above, each city would take pride in its special holiday-enhanced streetscape, which served two purposes: to brighten everyone’s spirits and, equally important, to remind all the townsfolk that the Christmas shopping season was well in hand. Spending, however, had to be budgeted for because credit cards had not yet been introduced. Often, shopkeepers maintained a “book” that indicated what you owed, and you could come in from time to time to pay down your debt. Every week after Christmas, my mom would send me up Main Street to give various shop owners five or ten dollars, which would gradually reduce the family's Christmas debt.

My mom loved Christmas. She took great pains to decorate our home with amazing adornments, which my sister and I treasured. I specifically remember a large Santa bust that mom proudly displayed on a wall in our living room. It seemed like every inch of our home, in one way or another, cried out Merry Christmas.

In the early and mid-50s, we had real Christmas trees. Still, as state regulations increased (we lived literally in a nursery school), we were forced to revert to a very sterile silver tree, which, unlike today’s editions, did not resemble a tree at all. But we still had fun.

Maybe it’s me, or perhaps it’s the mantra of every generation, but I could swear that people were considerably friendlier back then. “Merry Christmas” was said often and with genuine excitement as the countdown to the “big day” proceeded. Back then, we kids would set up an Advent calendar to mark the passing of December days. To the uninitiated, this glorious invention was simply a colorful calendar with a little window over each December day. At the same time, each day we were allowed to “open” that day’s window and reveal a piece of candy or a warm holiday saying. I preferred the ones with candy.

The toys of the time were fabulous (at least we thought so). I remember receiving my very first train set and being speechless. Erector Sets came with an instruction manual. Beginners like me stuck to the first few pages, which described how to construct a simple pulley. Suppose you were skilled (like most of my friends), you could go to the last page and try your hand at building a robot. Chemistry sets usually included a microscope, which let you see a host of amazing things. It has been documented that many future scientists were born because of that one Christmas present. Board games included Monopoly, The Game of Life, and Men in Space, which was introduced in 1960.

The secularization of Christmas was a deep concern among the clergy and many parishioners. It was not uncommon to hear a sermon lamenting the extent to which the materialistic and secular side of Christmas had overshadowed its religious significance. “Keep Christ In Christmas” was a refrain I heard repeatedly during the entire holiday season. It was as if two separate events were occurring: one involving “the birth of our savior,” which we somberly acknowledged when we went to church, and the other involving Santa Claus, reindeer, presents, Christmas trees, and eggnog, which we experienced all the rest of the time joyfully. I know my dad often expressed worry that “the true meaning of Christmas” would soon be lost in the overwhelming deluge of merchandising, which had become part and parcel of the Christmas experience. Yet no one was more into the spirit of giving than he was.

Today, upon reflection, I see Christmas as a dual holiday. Yes, it is at its core an important religious holiday. But it has also firmly established itself in our DNA as a joyous secular celebration of love, giving and community spirit. The two sentiments are not contradictory. As someone who watches Hallmark Christmas movies year-round, I can confidently report that the Christmas spirit, even in its purely secular form, can be a beautiful display of how love can indeed sustain us during the most difficult times.

Even the “commercialization” my dad was worried about possesses a positive side. When I was a Yorktown councilman (1992-2011), I often spoke with our local merchants, and they would confide that they would account for up to 40% of their annual sales in six weeks. On my trips to Japan, where only 1% of the population is Christian, I was surprised to see how much the secular side of Christmas is celebrated and promoted. Japan, with a newly rebounding economy, could well benefit from what the United States has experienced for over half a century: the “Christmas Sales Boost.”

As a kid in the 1950s, it seemed to me that the world was divided into two groups: those who opened their Christmas gifts on Christmas Eve and those (like my family) who waited until Christmas morning. Who among us could forget the first gleeful moment when you spotted your gift under the Christmas tree? My mom started our family tradition of stuffing stockings with all sorts of things and carefully placing them at the foot of my sister’s and my beds. Every Christmas morning, after opening our stockings, my sister and I were required to go to Christmas mass and, against all odds, try to focus on what the parish priest was saying. Then, after the short walk home, the long-anticipated, most thrilling part of our day (and year) began. Still dressed in our Sunday best, we would be escorted into the family room to open our presents, which were placed judiciously under the Christmas tree.

These joyous Christmas memories live on in my mind, and I am sure they do in yours as well. In 2025, we live in a much more troubling time. But let me humbly suggest that the true Christmas spirit is needed more than ever. By that, I mean a combination of both the secular and religious sides of the holiday. For me, the Christmas spirit is an attitude that then generates a series of selfless acts of kindness. It is what motivated my father to anonymously feed six families during the holiday season (we only found out after he passed away). It is what motivates a friend of mine to spend Christmas Eve every year with her kids, working in a soup kitchen feeding the less fortunate. It can manifest in a sincere effort to refrain from labelling anyone based on their geographical origin and to see them instead as individuals with dignity. It can be giving a coworker a small present or even a hug. Or it can be the act of telling someone you appreciate just how important they are to you. The point is that we need to understand from time to time that the most precious part of our lives is our family, friends and sense of humanity. There is no better time to recognize that fact than during this holiday season!

So enough of my life, what are your fondest memories? Whatever they are, hold on to them and share them with your family! Finally, from the bottom of my heart, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, everyone!