Confronting domestic abuse in our community

Westchester County is widely regarded as one of the safest counties in the nation.

That distinction reflects professional law enforcement, engaged civic leadership and a culture of coordination that prioritizes public safety. Our schools are strong, our neighborhoods are stable and our institutions are responsive. That safety is real, and it is something we must protect intentionally. And yet, even here in Westchester County, domestic violence remains present.

Domestic violence does not disappear because overall crime rates are low. It does not vanish because communities are well-resourced or outwardly stable. It exists quietly, often invisibly, behind closed doors. It crosses economic, cultural and professional boundaries. Its consequences ripple outward, to children, workplaces, healthcare systems and courts. This is why nuance, confidentiality and proactive coordination matter.

At the Putnam Northern Westchester Women’s Resource Center, confidentiality is not a procedural formality; it is a protective safeguard. Survivors must know that when they seek advocacy, shelter, counseling or legal support, their information will be handled with precision and discretion. A breach of confidentiality can jeopardize employment, housing, child custody and sometimes life itself. But confidentiality does not mean community silence.

Domestic violence is not simply a private matter; it is a public safety issue that demands structured, data-informed collaboration. Westchester County has long recognized this. Its well-established Domestic Violence High Risk Team (DVHRT) is widely regarded as a model for the rest of New York State. This multidisciplinary team brings together law enforcement, prosecutors, advocates, probation officers and medical professionals to identify and intervene in the most dangerous cases by using formal lethality assessment protocols to evaluate risk factors such as prior threats, access to weapons, strangulation, escalating violence and obsessive control. These evidence-based tools enable the team to triage cases appropriately, implement coordinated safety planning and deploy rapid intervention strategies designed to prevent fatal outcomes.

In 2025 alone, our agency supported 51 high-risk cases through this collaborative framework.

This work is not abstract. It involves real-time safety planning, coordinated risk assessment and strategic information-sharing, always within the boundaries of confidentiality and survivor consent. Our collaboration with the Westchester County Office for Women, Westchester Medical Center, Hope’s Door, and My Sisters’ Place strengthens the regional response. When advocates, medical professionals, prosecutors and law enforcement align around lethality assessment and coordinated intervention, lives are saved. This level of coordination is one reason Westchester remains among the safest counties in the country. Leadership has made this possible.

Robi Schlaff, former Director of the Westchester Office for Women, has been instrumental in building a countywide infrastructure that centers survivor safety while strengthening systemic accountability. David Ryan, former Chief of Police and Director of the Westchester County Domestic Violence High Risk Team, has advanced lethality-focused intervention strategies that have influenced practice across New York State.

Their contributions extend beyond policy and procedure; they have shaped culture. They have demonstrated that accountability and compassion are not opposites, but partners in prevention. For this reason, our agency will honor Robi Schlaff and Chief David Ryan with Lifetime Achievement Awards at our Gala on May 8, from 6 to 9 p.m., at the Putnam County Golf Course. Their leadership has had a significant statewide impact in strengthening coordinated domestic violence response.

However, institutional leadership alone is not enough. Every resident of Westchester County has a role to play. Faith leaders must speak clearly about dignity, accountability and nonviolence. Employers must protect employees experiencing abuse. Educators must teach young people what healthy relationships look like. Healthcare providers must screen with sensitivity and respond with care. Neighbors must be willing to act when warning signs escalate. And men, especially men, must lead. The overwhelming majority of severe domestic violence is perpetrated by men against women. Acknowledging that truth is not about blame; it is about responsibility. Strength is not dominance. Strength is self-control. Strength is emotional regulation.

Nothing, absolutely nothing, a woman says, wears, earns, posts, withholds, or expresses justifies violence. Anger does not justify violence. Jealousy does not justify violence. Infidelity does not justify violence. Financial stress does not justify violence. Alcohol does not justify violence. Past trauma does not justify violence. We are responsible for our responses.

Emotional regulation must be modeled in homes, reinforced in schools and expected in adulthood. Violence is not a momentary lapse; it is a decision to exert power through harm. Men must reject cultural narratives that equate masculinity with control. Control is not love. Surveillance is not love. Intimidation is not love. Fear is not love.

At the Putnam Northern Westchester Women’s Resource Center, our work is grounded in unconditional positive regard. Survivors deserve unwavering compassion, advocacy, shelter, counseling and pathways to independence. Those who have caused harm must be held accountable, but they too are capable of change when appropriate interventions are applied. Compassion does not weaken accountability; it strengthens prevention.

If Westchester County is to remain one of the safest counties in the nation, we must remain proactive. Safety is not permanent; it is sustained. Prevention begins in the home, with how disagreements are handled, how children observe conflict resolution, how boys are taught to manage frustration and how girls are taught to expect respect. Peace in the world begins with peace in the home.

Westchester’s safety is the product of collaboration, professionalism and shared responsibility. Sustaining it requires continued investment in coordinated response, advocacy, prevention education and survivor services.

If you believe in keeping Westchester County safe, if you believe in confidentiality, accountability, compassion, and proactive collaboration, I invite you to support our work at the Putnam Northern Westchester Women’s Resource Center. Learn more about our services, partnerships and our upcoming Gala on May 8, by visiting www.pnwwrc.org. I also encourage you to support the vital work of Hope’s Door (www.hopesdoorny.org) and My Sisters’ Place (www.mspny.org), whose advocacy strengthens survivor safety across Westchester County. Safety is not accidental. It is built together.

Piaget Solpiaget is the executive director of the Putnam Northern Westchester Women’s Resource Center. Learn more about the organization's upcoming May 8 gala by visiting pnwwrc.org.